Monday, March 28, 2005

As I'm fond of saying, its Mr. J dizzot! So, the blog is back, and of course, I'm sure you are overwhelmed with joyous feelings. Also, thank goodness, the comments work. That previous post about me and Haloscan singing kumbayaa in a rekindled relationship. . .yeah, just ignore that.

So, what's happened in the downtime? Well, I'm leaving town ladies and gents. Not forever mind you, but I am leaving town, going to Brentwood, TN. Why you ask? Apparently defensive driving. Which, as all of you who have ridden in the car with me may already know, I totally don't need. Actually, the truth is, I drive pretty offensively at the moment. I'm a horrible driver and unfortunately my driving record belies that. But not to worry, I should be a better driver after this class.

That actually is the long and short of everything for me as far as what's new goes, other than that its very much the same around here. Well, other than the fact that the hulk pics kinda had to go. That's right, I had to lose my hulk pictures. The size of them really. So no more moods for Javann. . .I'll be sure to cry a river about that later. Anyway, that's it for the new and improved deep thoughts, feel free to leave a comment.

Friday, March 25, 2005

Well this place looks different. Yep, that's right, after much practice and heartbreak, I finally got this ol' blog to look like something. Still don't have working comments. . .so it looks like me and Haloscan will join hands and sing Kumbayah once again. Its a sad but true fact. Ah well, maybe one day I can put them away for good. For now, enjoy the icy cool goodness of the current blog. It looks so spiffy!

Monday, March 21, 2005

I don't know what's wrong with my blog. Please forgive its ignorance. My spleen is great. And by spleen, I mean wrath. Complete and unrequited. Give me a few days, and this thing will act right. Stupid technology.

Anyway, this weekend was quite good, as I'm sure many of you are aware of. The assembly was here with good reminders for all of us, and a few sound department errors for which I can honestly say I was solely responsible for.

Uh. . .I'd ask for a comment, but I don't even know if they'll work. I'm sickened. Have a great day people.

Halocan, come back! I'm sorry!

Friday, March 11, 2005

For the general benefit for myself, I'm ditching Haloscan. Its been with me since I started this blog, well, actually I had blogspeak, and then it went belly up and Haloscan graciously stepped in, but now, now I'm sick of Haloscan. Doesn't work all the time, I have to refresh my browser just to get the thing to read the Javascript, I'm fed up. So I say DOWN WITH Haloscan! Down it shall be hurled into the fiery pit of deletion. However I treasure each of your comments, so for a limited time only, there shall be Haloscan and Blogger comments. I suggest you use the Blogger provided comments, but if you decide to use Haloscan, please, feel free. Honestly, I don't like how blogger doesn't do popups, but makes you go to a screen singling out the post you wish to comment on. But in all honesty, anything is better than the buggy coding I've come to know and love from Haloscan. Ah, biting the hand that supplies my comments. I'm sure I'll come crawling back to them with nothing but wine and good feelings, but for now, I'm not bitter, I'M MAD!!

That is all.
this is an audio post - click to play

Thursday, March 10, 2005

By the way, I'm officially on FedEx's payroll. And training with them, well, just let me say its insanity. Or maybe it'll drive you to insanity. . .either way. . .lets have some creative writing. . .

The night air was crisp, dark, clean. Rain fell around him lightly, as the track came into view. There he was. There he always was, waiting for him. He hung his head as he approached the track in the night air. There was nothing he could do. He had to run. Thoughts of turning back came to him, but he knew, he just KNEW he had to run. If he didn't, he would've wasted weeks, months of running and dieting, and he wasn't ready to give that up. As he stepped onto the track to stretch, it started.

"Well, well, look who showed up tonight. I thought the rain would have kept you inside."

"Never has and it never will."

"Oh, I think it has. I think it will again. You know why? Because you don't have what it takes. You're not strong enough. You don't want it enough. You know what you are?"

He finished stretching and looked up.

"No, what am I?"

"You're scum. You're worthless. You are what floats in the toilet, right before I flush it, the piece that's so riddled with fat that it barely gets sucked down into the empty void of nothing. You are soft. You are weak. You are nothing."

The night air begin to fill his lungs as he took his first step. It felt good, good enough to warrant another step, and another, until he begin to lose count of his steps. As he rounded the second bend, it continued.

"You can't run a little faster? What are you waiting for? What are you afraid of? You trying to save some energy? Come on pudgy. Run! RUN!!"

Third lap. His knees were starting to ache, and his lungs begin to join in with them. He could feel the burn.

"You hurting yet, piggy? You feel the burn? Oh, we going to cook that bacon tonight."

Fourth lap. He could feel his back hurt, and he wasn't sure how long he could keep this pace up. The pain in his knee had mutated from its dull throbbing, to a sharp constant pain. But he couldn't stop. He wouldn't stop.

He stopped. Condensed air from his lungs fogged his contact lenses, and he held his knees as he continued to gasp for air. How far had he gone? Had he even made a mile? Last lap he could remember was six. He'd made a mile. Good.

"Say hello."
"Hello to what?"
"Your own personal wall. That's right. You're body doesn't want to keep going. It's telling you to stop because its not comfortable. Its just like you. Weak. Soft. Right now, its miserable and it doesn't want to keep going. And you're going to let it off the hook like you always do. Why don't you go give it some doughnuts to make it feel better? Maybe it'd like a double cheeseburger combo meal, with supersized soda and fries? Why don't you go to a buffet, and give in to it, just like you always have."

"No I haven't. . ."

"Yes you have. I'm looking at you. I've got eyes. You've never said no to food. You probably eat twice in the same hour, thinking that you don't feel full. Go ahead, Nancy. Quit."

"Don't call me Nancy!"


He shot forward and begin running again. Forget the pain. Forget the pain. Forget the pain. He felt the warmth crawl up from his ankles, to his knees. Hello shin splints. On a night like tonight, that warmth was welcome. He savored it as he tried to block out his "companion's" voice.

"Right now, you can feel your body screaming. Rebelling. It doesn't want to run anymore. But you're forcing it to. How long can you do that? How long can you will it to run?"

"Until I beat you."

He heard the whisper in his voice as he stopped again, this time in agony, to catch his breath.

"You never will."

He looked up and began walking home, head down. A feeling of defeat swept over him. He'd run his two miles for today, and he'd done all he could. As he passed the older couple walking towards the track he nodded, smiled, and kept walking with his head down.

The old lady watched as he walked by, and then she turned to her husband.

"He's losing weight. Look at him. He's a lot thinner than he was a few months ago."

The old man nodded in agreement. The older lady kept looking back at him as he went by.

"The strangest thing though," she said with a look of concern in her eye, "I was out here the other day, when you were sick, and I heard voices. As I got closer, I heard names like 'Nancy boy', 'piggy', 'pudgy', 'chubby', and I even heard 'give up' and all kinds of discouraging things, but when I got close to the track, I couldn't see anyone but him. Then it hit me. I heard him. He was calling himself all those things. That's why I don't like coming to the track without you. You know what they say about people who talk to themselves don't you?"

My mood?

Torment by numbers. . .

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

So, I'm always like, John Coltrane this, Jimi Hendrix that, blah blah old is better, old is better, blah blah. Well guess what? I'm still John Coltrane this, and Jimi Hendrix that. Old is better. I hate to be the bubble buster, but the old school guys didn't have all the tools if you will, that the new guys had. You see the key to being the "best", or even to be considered the best, is to be the first. For instance, who holds the patent for the telephone. Alexander Graham Bell. Who the cares who else has done things for the phone? Bell did it first. He was the innovative one, not people who came along and built on his work. Of course, this is, as usual, my own skewed logic, because technically nothing is new, Bell built his own invention on the discoveries of electrical conductivity through wires, as well as that of converting sound into electrical current and back again. Not to mention, fiberoptics, which has its greatest use in the field of communications, really doesn't build on any of that.

But I'm talking music, not science, and really, if we want to get down to it, music is an art and there's no way to really prove that one piece of art is better than another. So what am I talking about? I'm talking about John Coltrane. Here's a sample of one of his songs. You might like it, you might like to see it deleted, I'll leave that up to you to decide.

Mr. P.C. - John Coltrane

My mood?

Stop making me watch training videos!

Monday, March 07, 2005

to you im like a flavor that wouldnt last/you took one bite than spat me out real fast

Finally, something that's not an audio post. There is truly nothing better. As usual, its a Monday. So this being the type of Monday that it is, i.e. I'm tired, here's a quiz and an mp3. Entertain yourselves.

You Are 20% Left Brained, 80% Right Brained

The left side of your brain controls verbal ability, attention to detail, and reasoning.

Left brained people are good at communication and persuading others.

If you're left brained, you are likely good at math and logic.

Your left brain prefers dogs, reading, and quiet.

The right side of your brain is all about creativity and flexibility.

Daring and intuitive, right brained people see the world in their unique way.

If you're right brained, you likely have a talent for creative writing and art.

Your right brain prefers day dreaming, philosophy, and sports.

And the mp3?

I Liked You Better Before You Were Naked On The Internet - From First To Last Yes, I know, its a weird song title, but take a listen. Its actually pretty good. And there's no other references to nudity on the internet.

My mood?

Just slapping my bass fiddle and singing my song. . .

Tuesday, March 01, 2005

I am a one way motorway/I’m the one that drives away/Then follows you back home
I am a street light shining/I’m a wild light blinding bright/Burning off alone

So here we are. I decided to let Jerm's Saturday post stand alone for Monday, in hopes that more people would take the psychological disorder test. Still waiting for Dr. J to get around to answering questions and solving problems? Not to worry, the Doctor is in. By the way, these are all my opinions based on what the test says, its nothing personal, my friends.

Paranoid |||||||||||||||| 66%
Schizoid |||||||||||| 46%
Schizotypal |||||||||||| 50%
Antisocial |||||||||||| 50%
Borderline |||||||||||||| 58%
Histrionic |||||||||||| 46%
Narcissistic |||||| 26%
Avoidant |||||||||| 38%
Dependent |||||||||||| 50%
Obsessive-Compulsive |||||||||||||||||||| 82%

Calm down! Everything doesn't have to be in the same place all the time. And no one's out to get you.

Paranoid |||||||||||||||| 70%
Schizoid |||||||||||||||| 70%
Schizotypal |||||||||||||||||||| 90%
Antisocial |||||||||||||||||||| 86%
Borderline |||||||||||||||| 62%
Histrionic |||||||||||||||||| 78%
Narcissistic |||||||||||| 50%
Avoidant |||||||||||||||| 70%
Dependent |||||||||||| 42%
Obsessive-Compulsive |||||||||| 38%

At least you're not obsessive compulsive.

Paranoid |||| 14%
Schizoid |||||||||||||| 58%
Schizotypal |||||||||||||||| 66%
Antisocial |||||||||||| 42%
Borderline |||||||||| 38%
Histrionic |||||||||| 38%
Narcissistic |||||||||||||| 58%
Avoidant |||||||||||| 42%
Dependent |||||||||||| 46%
Obsessive-Compulsive |||||||||||| 46%

Wow. You're normal. Well, except for that whole not being close to anyone but yourself.
Paranoid |||||||||||| 46%
Schizoid |||||||||||||||||||| 86%
Schizotypal |||||||||||||| 54%
Antisocial |||||| 30%
Borderline||||| 30%
Narcissistic |||||||||| 38%
Avoidant ||||||||||||46%
Dependent |||||| 22%
Obsessive-Compulsive |||||||||||||||||| 78%

You and Jon should be friends. You'd never be close, but you're a lot alike.

Paranoid |||||||||| 34%
Schizoid |||||||||||||||||| 74%
Schizotypal|||| 14%
Antisocial |||| 18%
Borderline |||||||||||| 42%
Histrionic |||||||||||| 42%
Narcissistic |||||||||| 34%
Avoidant |||||| 26%
Dependent |||||||||||||||| 66%
Obsessive-Compulsive |||||| 22%

Uh. . .there sure are a lot of schizoids that come to this site. You're one of them.

Okay so there's Dr. J's analysis. Other Dr. J's?