Wednesday, December 31, 2008

So, another year has gone. Now its time to recap the year. Again. . .something's gotta be better.

Javann's Completely Awesome Year (Not Quite Completely Awesome, But okay)

1. What did you do in 2008 that you'd never done before?
I moved out. I moved into a house with my sister. It was. . .different and not done before.
2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I have no resolve, much less during new years to do anything

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Um. . .yeah, I'm sure someone did, I just don't remember.
4. Did anyone close to you die?
Kenneth Goode. He was a great man and his death made me hurt.

5. What countries did you visit?
The US of A. But it wasn't really a visit.

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
Honestly? I don't know, some answers to the questions that always seem to resurface when I sit alone in the dark.

7. What date(s) from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Uh, the day that I visited Columbia, SC and was the best man in Jacob's wedding. What date was that? I really can't remember. But I assure you, it is etched in my memory.

8. What were your biggest achievements of the year?
Getting another. . .oh wait that was in 2007. . .I accomplished nothing.
9. What was your biggest failure?
I don't want to tackle this question.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
My first strained muscle in my lower back, hooray!! Numerous cuts, and a lot of food poisoning. Stupid food poisoning.
11. What were the best things you bought?
Uh. . .I really didn't buy anything substantial this year, maybe some new shoes, a cool sweater. That's about it.
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
No one really. Well, Tre did start pioneering, and become an EMT. So hooray for him. And I didn't mean that sarcastically, even though that's how I said it.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
No one appalled or depressed me. . .except for myself of course. Yay.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Petrol (my goodness the petrol) clothing

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Nothing really. . .I can never figure out if my life is depressing or if its just this form. . .
16. What song will always remind you of 2008?
Viva La Vida - Coldplay

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
(a) happier or sadder? believer it or not happier
(b) thinner or fatter? thinner (yes!)
(c) richer or poorer? In theory richer, but in practice still broke

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Traveling and cool stuff. More cool stuff should've been done

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Work? I guess.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
Somewhere dark quiet, and thankfully non-festive

22. Did you fall in love in 2008?
No. Of course not.

23. How many one-night stands?
I've got this nice plastic rubber maid storage drawer set that I keep next to my bed, had a five inch television on it, so I guess you can call it a night stand. And it is a singular.

24. What was your favorite TV program?
Robot Chicken really showed me something. As did Aqua Teen Hungerforce, but that's normal of course.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
My list of abhorrance is only comparable to my list of mistakes

26. What was the best book you read?
Keep Yourselves in God's Love
27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
This year? TV on the Radio, My Morning Jacket
28. What did you want and get?
Separation

29. What did you want and not get?
I'm sticking with last years answer:
Completion

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
This year? Hmmm. . .Pineapple Express. It was hilarious.
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I uh, did nothing. Yeah, that's about right.

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Learning more. About anything.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
Half metal and half hip hop, all stylish of course

34. What kept you sane?
Who said I was sane?

35. Which celebrity figure did you fancy the most?
How about that Meagan Fox? Rawr!
36. What political issue stirred you the most?
Spiritual blindness not being an issue.

37. Who did you miss?
Roldie. He moved so far away.

38. Who was the best new person you met?
Uh. . .Reed Cavanaugh. You'd think that name would be enough. And you'd be right in that thought. If you don't know Reed Cavanaugh, you should stop what you're doing find him and meet him, right now!

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008?
I need to buckle down and go back to college. If I don't get my degree, I'll spend the rest of my life miserable and somewhat unfulfilled.
40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
I'm an ever rollin' wheel, without a destination real.
I'm an ever spinning top, whirling around till I drop.
Oh but what am I to do, my mind is in a whirlpool.
Give me a little hope, one small thing to cling to.
You got me going in circles (oh round and round I go)
You got me going in circles
(oh round and round I go, I'm spun out over you)
I'm a faceless clock, with timeless hopes that never stop.
Lord but I feel that way, of my soul. My soul is stay.
Oh but what am I to do, my mind is in a whirlpool.
Give me a little hope, one small thing to cling to.
You got me going in circles (oh round and round I go)
You got me going in circles
(oh round and round I go) I'm spun out over you
(I need you baby) over you (I need you baby) spun out over you.
(I need you baby, I need you baby baby)
I'm spun (I need you baby) I said I'm spun out over you (I need you baby)
Spun out over you (I need you baby, I need you baby, I need you baby)

Don't ask for explanation. Well you can ask, I won't guarantee the answers. Anyway, thanks for the time, and spit the intelligence at me.

Monday, October 13, 2008

Maybe I've lost all reason/no, I know, baby I've lost all reason/why are we together/when all we do is hurt each other/constantly fighting/tearing ripping and biting/good times are bad times/bad times are worse times/I'm so. . .confused?/I feel so used/but it feels so sweet. . .

The last time was simply magic/no the last time was simply tragic/it hurts me so deeply/and it hurts me so sweetly/that I can't let go of who we are/and I know that "we" won't get far/rip my veins apart with your hate/reconstruct my heart I'll be your blank slate

tears in my eyes/a lump in my throat/a smile on my lips/I'm afraid I can't let go/I'm so near and you're so close/and now as I ooze to the ground/I can't help but think. . .

you're what brought me down. . .

I love to hate you/I hate to love you/I want to need you/I need to want you/I can't see because I'm blinded/ I'm blinded because I can see/

I see you standing over me. . .over me. . .over me. . .
Okay, so lately I've just been dropping in, dropping poetry, and dropping out. Why break a good habit? This is more of a song though. Or actually songs. That's plural. Because there's two of them.

Human Alien

Everything is different, nothing is the same/no one cares about you, and no one knows your name/burning lungs set ablaze by loose tongues/the memories only pretty when it burns

human alien
no one really cares
human alien
everyone stares
human alien

seven billion enemies, a true army of one/unfulfilled desires, and another life comes undone/passive fires, sparked by aggressive liars/its okay/you'll have your day/ under the sun

human alien


Surrender the Night

a plane we can't attain to/ a place we dare not be/a dread no one will admit to/a fear not meant for me/glaciers replace warm desires/numbness creeeps up on me

in this dead revival
we're so bent on survival
sacrifice what's right
give up the good fight
and. . .
surrender the night

a cold blank slate buried deep in the snow/a heart filled with hate, until it grows cold/this is my own sorrow/I can beg or borrow/but its not right

in this dead revival
we're so bent on survival
sacrifice what's right
give up the good fight
and . . .
surrender the night

That's all I got for you for now ladies and gents. Love peace and nappyness.

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

You're so beautiful i'm so clueless, you're so perfect I'm such a loser, I'm one of your notches, bowing to my love goddess, Aphrodite, Athena, Halle, I bend at the knees like Jon Salley, I'm sculpted artwork for your gallery, nude chubby teddy bear at attention, you're an ascension to another dimension, I'm just your discension, maybe an honorable mention, I don't care who cares or who doesn't, or what was or even wasn't, deny me be ashamed, take the credit, give me the blame, on my hands and knees, begging to be decieved, lied to, tried to, I tried to retain my composure, but this exposure, my dignity stripped, my manhood's ripped, take me by the hand to the slaughter, me someone's son you someone's daughter, I hurt for your pleasure, I bleed only for you to measure, my soul pours at your feet, I can't be discreet, I want the world to know, berate me for show, assert your dominance, destroy my prominence, obliterate my common sense. . .


First Draft,
8/25/08

Monday, August 25, 2008

How do you go through life constantly flirting, constantly hurting, deep inside in your mind's eye, you have everything to hide, almost nothing to lose, and still you abuse, yourself and everyone else, who makes contact, every conversation is combat, its pathetic, how you regret it, then tomorrow forget it, but don't sweat it, it'll all be over soon, your time in the womb, will soon end in the tomb, and when you're cold and alone, listen to this, my song, it might make you sigh and moan, or even cry and groan, maybe you'll suddenly feel grown, remember that I like this song, am just so real, and like me, I hope this just makes you feel.

08/25/08

(First and extremely rough draft)

Tuesday, August 05, 2008

When you need a friend/don't turn to a stranger/you know in the end/I'll always be there/and when you're in doubt/or when you're in danger/just look all around/and I'll be there

Ah yes. The blog. Hello all. Well, all one of you. A lot of different things on my mind, so instead of just picking one and ranting for a page or so, I figured I would just, you know, give you a taste, or actually better yet a cross section of what its like to be in my mind. Um. . .segue!

Speaking of which, my first thought is the idea of me doing an album. Another album, I guess I should say, because I did actually produce a first. It just never really got any steam under it. Wait, I guess I should clarify. It sucked, and was really just a lot of random stuff I'd done with no real theme or merit, or actual playing or singing or words or anything. So I was thinking the other day about how most people who know me find my thought process. . .odd I guess. Well guess what? It is odd. And what better way to let the world in general into my head than through music. That is the best way right? Because if not this idea sucks. Anyway, I was going to make an album highlighting my thought process throughout a normal day. Or an album made entirely on one day of the week. Or some such nonsense. I'll be sure to let everyone know more when I figure out exactly what I'm going to do. Oh and if any of my friends with musical talent (exempt yourself from this request Jerm. Sorry) want to help me put together a song or two (and remember I really really really am a difficult person to work with on any creative endeavour) feel free to call me (if you're my friend then you have my number. duh)

Lately, I've been trying to piece together my thoughts on why I'm so, and I'm quoting what I've been told in the past, "complicated" and "mean". Well as far as the mean goes, I think its because I really don't like much. Not even myself. So I've cut out the possibility that I'm arrogant. But I think there's an even chance that I have some ridiculous standard which I expect all to measure up to, even though there's not a remote standard that anyone can or will meet it. As far as complicated goes, what did you not just read that last paragraph? Alliterate moron. See? I didn't even read that last paragraph, and I'm berating you, gentle reader, for not reading it. Of course, if you're here, you probably did, and so I guess that whole berating (beration?) was in vain. Or something like that. Anyway, I think that's the whole point of everything so far.

Phrases that I've been using way too much:
Sweet Mama Pajama!
Monster in verb and noun form, i.e. "Man that lane 49 is a monster!" or "Dude, I'm over here straight monstering these lanes."
Ridiculous


Also as a side not, Donato Alphonse D'Elia is quite possibly the coolest man alive. And as soon as I find a gift appropiate to his greatness, I intend to surprise him with it. Hmmm. . .of course it won't be much of a surprise anymore if he reads this. Uh. . .D.A. if you read this try to forget that I said that.



That is all.






Seriously. . .






Now you're just getting pathetic








Go do something else!!

















You didn't go do something else did you?

















Okay, okay okay fine, you can stop shouting encore. Uh. . .here's one last thought. Then seriously you're going to have to go do something else. As I get older I notice that my confidence level rises. Situations that used to make me nervous (and start sweating like I was running a marathon) now have little to no effect on me. Coincidence? I think not. Okay that was a thought now begone.

















Begone I say!

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Okay, okay. Yes, I'm fine. I just was having a bad few weeks there. But I'm in a full recovery (well maybe not a FULL recovery)and I'm doing well. Which of course, is a good thing. Either way, I'm really hungry, and I have to do something for dinner so this is going to have to be short and sweet. Like this is going to end right now. Well, right now. Well right now. Well. . .wait this is a never ending cycle of stupidity. I'm outta here!

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

My whole world's up. . .side down

I am low. The lowest I've ever been. I don't know what to expect anymore, I don't know what to be anymore, and frankly, I don't know anything anymore. The worse part of being in a valley is climbing back to the top. Eventually, you have to leave, and then when you do. . .well, things are what they are I suppose.

Ever feel like giving up? Ever feel like you're fighting a pointless battle? Then we're on the same page. I'm going to go do something else. . .


sorry to end on such a bleak note. Uh. . .banana creme pies. That's the best thing I got for you right now.

Since when did being alive count as a positive?

Thursday, March 20, 2008

One love, you're lucky to have one love, it sounds bugged, drinking wine from the same jug, one heart, one mind one soul

As I get older, I believe more and more that there are certain people that you connect with. Rather it be some rare combination of personality traits that sync up well with yours, or if its because of some physiological hard wired experiences in your brain that you share, I feel like there are just some people that you always will be connected to. Not in the mystical sense, because that, my friends, is bologna, but in the sense that you what you look for, what makes you smile, what makes you feel a sense of loyalty, in short, what you want other human beings to be, may be, and indeed can be, encased in others. Some people will say that certain people are special, maybe they just sell your particular brand of charismatic, either way you want to explain it, it happens. And when it happens, it would almost be foolish to walk away from that connection. Because in life, we are all in a dark void, reaching out for something, for someone who will make us feel as if we are important, or as if we belong. We all want someone who feels how we do, who agrees with us, or who just understands where we're coming from. Finding that person is an uphill battle, finding someone who really cares rarely happens, and when we find even one such person, we should never forsake them, or take them for granted. Rare is the person deserving of such loyalty, and if we can find even one person who deserves to be treated as such, maybe just maybe, we can find happiness in ourselves. Loyalty is hard to define, so is friendship, and love is a word we may never truly understand in our imperfect capacities. But that surely doesn't mean that we shouldn't try.

Thursday, February 28, 2008

Pack it up, pack it in/Let me begin/I came to win/battle me that's a sin/I won't ever slack up/punk you better back up/or else the whole crew'll act up

So. . .apparently people read this. Crikey. Which by the way is highly inappropiate considering that that guy died. So what's new? Well, I moved sucessfully to a house with my loving sister, then the washing maching flooded the downstairs. This was yesterday. Well, not the moving, just the flooding. It was bad. Very bad. Extremely bad. Well, yeah, it really was. So. . .I spent yesterday with a wet dry vac cursing the man who thought of carpet. Or at least absorbent flooring. Would it hurt to have rubberized floors that we could then just squeegee dry when they get soaked in water? Would that truly be a bad thing? No it wouldn't, but we have carpet. Which is basically a sponge you walk on. Why do I say that? Because I personally vacuumed about oh seventy gallons of water out of the carpet. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know which is worse, that I had to vacuum that out, or that there was that much to vacuum. The water bill is going to be good fuel for fire at least, since that will be how we keep warm when they turn the utilities off. Of course, all I have to do is keep that guy away from the box so he can't shut it off. . .hmmm, I guess I'll be sitting outside with a shotgun for a few. . .months.

Disclaimer: Javann isn't starving or dying from poverty, he is merely joking. In a funny ha-ha kind of way. However if you really feel badly enough about it, you should send him money. He'll gladly accept cash, credit card, PayPal, or really just anything you want to send him. Seriously, it could be a half eaten can of tuna. Well maybe not tuna, he hates that stuff. But if its the kind in the bag, maybe you could send that. Right.

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Hello there. Are you the man of the house? Yes? Well then let me be the first to congratulate you! You're getting all new electronics! How is this possible? Because I'm taking your current models! Hands where I can see them, first person to move will be deeply missed by their respective loved ones.

So one of my favorite things to do is make playlists on my iPod. Not just any type of playlist, because that would be dull. These are themed playlists. Such as "In event of alien attack." Or "Thou Shalt Rock Olympus." Or my personal favorite, "Consistent Failure: The Sound Track of My Life". Eventually I'll upgrade my iTunes and I'll be able to share these mixes with the world, but until I get around to that, I'll just post my favorite one. Which happens to be the soundtrack of my life. This is the third (or fourth) iteration of said soundtrack, basically because I change it everytime my iPod crashes. Hold on a sec. . .apparently I'm now being sued by Apple. Whoops. That's right boys n girls, or boyz n da hood, whichever you prefer my iPod crashes regularly. Which is both sad and mundane at the same time. Hmmm. . .anyway, here's the stuff of dreams. No wait, that's the other playlist. Here's Consistent Failure.

Consistent Failure (The Soundtrack of My Life)

1. Good Luck ft. Lisa Kekaula - Basement Jaxx
2. Breed - Nirvana
3. Nookie - Limp Bizkit
4. Come Together - The Beatles
5. Marvo Ging - The Chemical Brothers
6. Better Off Without You - The Clarks
7. Crooked Teeth - Death Cab For Cutie
8. Rebirth of Slick (Cool Like That) - Diggable Planets
9. Flower - Eels
10. Leave Me Alone - Ellen Allien and Apparat
11. Hero - Enrique Iglesias
12. Brimful of Asha (Cornershop) - Fatboy Slim
13. Paralyzer - Finger Eleven
14. In The Mood - Glenn Miller
15. Just A Thought - Gnarls Barkley
16. Die All Right - Hives
17. Give It Up - LCD Soundsystem
18. Our House - Madness
19. Transmission - Meat Beat Manifesto
20. Parking Lot - Mineral
21. Close Edge - Mos Def
22. Wonderful Place - N.E.R.D.
23. Backstabbers - O'Jays
24. Humming - Portishead (which coincidentally is also on In case of alien attack)
25. Get It And Go - Razorlight
26. Tainted Love - Soft Cell (eh eh get away, I've got to eh eh run away)
27. Driving South - Stone Roses
28. A Slight Attack - The Tea Party
29. Cross Out The Eyes - Thursday
30. I'm A Rambling Man - Waylon Jennings
31. Do Me A Favour - Arctic Monkeys

Apparently this is a double disc soundtrack. . .wow. Is life really that long?

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Last night I cut my hair. And by cut, I mean I really cut it. Its back to its natural buzzed form, which I've concluded after seeing myself with hair and without that I don't think I like. Its a conclusion based on what I've grown accustomed to seeing. Which means, I'm used to seeing myself with hair, so now I don't like seeing myself with hair. Either way, that apparently is how I get down. OR whatever. I'm trying to sound intelligent and cool and its coming off as dorky and stupid. Which is why kids, you should never try. I'm going to end this now since I don't really want to reveal how shallow I really am. I'm going to go stare at my hair in the mirror. See? I'm shallow.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

I lack ambition. I should be dictator of the world and instead I'm just sitting around playing video games and eating cheez-its with canned cheese topping. Do you know how pathetic that is? Not that I'm not ruler of the world, that's just coincidental, but I'm putting cheese spread on cheese flavored crackers. . .I need a change of pace

Work week's over for me. I'm sure you're thinking, "but Javann, its only Tuesday." That's right drones, I work three days a week. Correction, three nights a week. Thirty six hours crammed into a tiny rubbermaid week. Never done it? Avoid it. It sucks. I take that back, it doesn't suck. I mean, it pays bills (sorta) and its kinda nice to be off work (sorta) and I gotta admit it does pay bills (sorta). But it hurts. Imagine all the stuff you've seen in a Target. Everything you buy (with the exception of fresh produce and sushi, that stuff gets there some other way) comes in boxes. Boxes that I have to move. If your target is between Birmingham, Atlanta or Knoxville, chances are I have touched something you've bought. Which, I know, is a really disturbing thought. That having been said, my back is hurting and I'm starting to drift into a blank stare that indicates that I need sleep. So please feel free to call me master of the universe. Sometimes even I don't understand me. . .

Wednesday, January 09, 2008

I like when people brag about their musical tastes being "diverse". It makes me giggle at how small their world really is. If you really were that diverse, you wouldn't brag about it. You'd just be. . .its like saying that you're not a racist at every opportunity. Well, if you're not a racist, guess what? You don't have to say it.

So, what did I just buy from iTunes? What do you mean, you don't care? Pipe down, pipsqueak and enjoy the recently bought artists widget that iTunes so lovingly provides. They even cooked me dinner.

Thursday, January 03, 2008

Javann's Year of Immense Proportion!!
(Slightly overrated)
(Makes you not want to read this doesn't it?)


1. What did you do in 2007 that you'd never done before?
Uh. . .crap. Paid over 2000 dollars of my own money in car repairs?

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Sorry, I don't resolve anything much less during new years.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Renee Brazelton, and I'm sure some other people

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Ben Williams. I wish I'd known him better

5. What countries did you visit?
America! Yay!
6. What would you like to have in 2007 that you lacked in 2006?
Money. Time. Power. Respect. (What you need in life?)
7. What date(s) from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
July 7th - 7/7/07 emphasized perfection, also the date that I turned 25. Unfortunately everyone and their mom wanted to get married on that date. Stupid.

8. What were your biggest achievements of the year?
Getting back in school, and getting another job. And finally quitting FedEx. Man, that felt good.
9. What was your biggest failure?
I guess being a good friend. . .

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Yeah a few sicknesses and a ton of scars.
11. What were the best things you bought?
A new phone! a coffee table (very nice) and a really cool upright floor lamp
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Any friends that I still have that put up with me and all that's entailed with that.
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Everyone apalled me at times, myself included. Depressed me? My own behavior mostly.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Food, gas (my goodness the gas!) gadgetry, and stupid transfer fees. Redstone you suck!
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Starting a new job. . .wow I suck.
16. What song will always remind you of 2008?
Here We Go Again - O.K. Go Cause of the Treadmill video
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
(a) happier or sadder? About the same
(b) thinner or fatter? Thinner
(c) richer or poorer? Still broke.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Saving. I know it sounds old, but dude if I'd just saved more money. . .
19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Working, acting without rational thought, spending money

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
Somewhere dark quiet, and thankfully non-festive

22. Did you fall in love in 2007?
Nopers. No love to report. Sorry. Don't hold your breath for next year, I'm pretty sure this won't change.

23. How many one-night stands?
I've got this nice plastic rubber maid storage drawer set that I keep next to my bed, had a five inch television on it, so I guess you can call it a night stand. And it is a singular.

24. What was your favorite TV program?
Started out watching Heroes, then I hit this I'm no longer watching TV and willingly being controlled by mass medai phase that I'm currently in now. So now I hate all television. . .though I don't qualify music videos on youtube, televised sporting events, newscasts involving sports, and DVD's as television
25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
My list of abhorrance is only comparable to my list of mistakes.

26. What was the best book you read?
The Art of War by Sun Tzu. Get down with some of this.
27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
This year? Uh. . .crap, haven't really been trying to listen to new music this year. My bad.
28. What did you want and get?
A new place to stay, and a new job. Rock.
29. What did you want and not get?
Completion.

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
Hmmm. . .I Am Legend was good. . .text me for a better answer.
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 25 on July 7th, and I became perfection emphasized. . .lol, just kidding. I wonder if anyone turned 25 on 6/6/06. How embarrassing. . .

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Learning more. About anything.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2003?
Hip-hop preppy.
34. What kept you sane?
Who said I was sane?

35. Which celebrity figure did you fancy the most?
Man that Jessica Biel is hot. . .and so's Meagan Fox, as well as Meagan Goode.
36. What political issue stirred you the most?
The incredibly infallibleness of world issues to conform to Bible prophecy.

37. Who did you miss?
Uh. . .um. . .I don't think I missed anyone.

38. Who was the best new person you met?
Didn't meet to many new people, and they were all bad. Rock.
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007?
Get up, get out, and do something with yourself.

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
It's alright / to tell me / what you think / about me
I won't try / to argue / or hold it / against you
I know that / you're leaving / you must have / your reasons
the season / is calling / and your pictures / are falling down

The steps that / I retrace / the sad look / on your face
the timing / and structure / did you hear / he her?
a day late / a buck short / I'm writing / the report
on losing / and failing / when I move / I'm flailing now

And it's happened once again
I'll turn to a friend
someone that understands
sees through the master plan

But everybody's gone
and I've been here for too long
to face this on my own
well I guess this is growing up
well I guess this is growing up

And maybe / I'll see you / at a movie / sneak preview
you'll show up / and walk by / on the arm / of that guy
and I'll smile / and you'll wave / we'll pretend / it's okay
the charade / it won't last / when he's gone / I won't come back

And it'll happen once again
you'll turn to a friend
someone that understands
and sees through the master plan

But everybody's gone
and you've been there for too long
to face this on your own
well I guess this is growing up

Well, I guess this is growing up
well, I guess this is growing up
well, I guess this is growing up
well, I guess this is growing up
well, I guess this is growing up
Don't ask for explanation. Well you can ask, I won't guarantee the answers. Anyway, thanks for the time, and spit the intelligence at me.