Wednesday, May 26, 2004

Well, election time is quickly approaching, which means only one thing. . .people I don't know or particularly care about telling me they can solve my problems. Of course, they can't, there's nothing they can do but give me empty promises meant to be broken, but I have to admit they do that well. Or maybe its just that they do that frequently, because even a small child can see through their "master" plan to rule the world. Why would anyone take a job as a politician anyway? Its thankless. All the good you may want to do, you'll never accomplish because there's more government red tape than there are people wanting to make a change. Compared to the money it takes to get the job, the job itself doesn't pay worth even bothering. And lets not even talk about the constant hassle of listening to other people's pathetic and often times insignificant problems. Roads to be paved, noise to be halted, stores to be zoned and built, subdivisions seeking total seclusion, all of these are things that annoy me and would drive me to be as cynical as possible. Roads not smooth enough? Buy luxury cars or walk. Not enough stores? Learn how to do without. Too much noise? Don't worry about it, chances are you'll be deaf soon anyway. Want total seclusion? The cememtary's always quiet last I checked. I'm not saying that you should kill yourself, but you could live there, seeing how nobody else does. Basically, I could care less about the daily "problems" that certain citizens of the bourgeoisie and upper class have with the city. You don't like it? You want to seclude yourself? Prison is also a very closed off space with good security. Why not go there? In the long run, I think that anyone who really wanted to get elected would admit that he couldn't solve problems, at all. All he could do is make sure that everyone had someone to complain to. Because in all actuallity, that's all anyone wants. Seeing results is also a good thing, but not as good as the relief you get from spewing all your anger at someone. Why do you think they call themselves public servants?
My mood?

Fed up. . .

Thursday, May 20, 2004

Today. Its not yesterday, and it definitely isn't tomrrow. Chances are today is exactly what you wanted or needed. Today is the type of day that you could sit down outside, watch the sunrise, and really take the time to reflect on life. Today. Today is grasping the here and now, and taking advantage of that which is in front of you. Yesterday is officially the past, and the past is often only remembered today, but is definitely forgotten tomorrow. Tomorrow, today will be the past, but today will not pass into yesterday easily forgotten. Today is the day that we remember tomorrow, and undoubtedly, today will be the memories that should have been forged yesterday. Yes, today will forever live in the memories of those to whom yesterday and tomorrow were most important, for today will be the day when those individual shall live in the present. Today will not consist of constant longing for the past, or with the desire to look forward only to the future, but today will be a day of the present, a day in which all who are so eagerly running forward, or longingly looking back will be forced to stop and notice their surrounding conditions. Yes, today will be that day. Today.

(Thunderous Applause)

My mood?

Every time I transform, I have to lose my shirt. . .that last one was Armani. . .ARMANI!!

Wednesday, May 19, 2004

Wednesday. People graduated from high school yesterday, and we ate food with them. Good times. I wrote this yesterday.

I'm pathetic, I useless, I'm nowhere in between,
Don't be sympathetic, that's useless, just another dream,
another hope, another thought, and its really just for you,
throw me a rope, pull it taught, and now you've saved you.
Gravity pulls at me, the ground rushes up, and soon I'll be gone.
I don't want you to see, how my body turns up, your part is done.
Don't cry, just remember that I told you I would eventually depart
this world is a lie, and I know that if you could you'd rip it all apart.
I can walk, I can stand, I can talk understand, and as I leave screaming,
I realize this will end simply because I don't know I'm dreaming.

My mood?

Lets go club seal pup hunters

Tuesday, May 18, 2004

Yep, its Tuesday. Tuesday, the day of Tues. Apparently, some people think I don't post enough in my blog. A ten day break and now you talk about me posting. You don't miss your water till the well runs dry. Of course there's no water involved in this blog because electronics and water don't mix. At all. So what is the Javann thinking? Well, yesterday outside Food World, I saw this old man walking across the street. As he walked, you could tell he was in pain. He had on a formal dress shirt and a pair of slacks, and some really big black thick glasses. And as I watched him walk across the road, I stood there to make sure that the car that was coming toward him stopped in time. It made me think about how sad it is when the human body deteriorates. What is it like to think that this is it? I remember talking to an older man at one point, and him saying that he'd seen everyone he knew die, and that he knew one day that he too would die, and he seemed rather resigned to his fate. How does a person cope with that kind of pallor looming over you in the distance? As I watched the elderly man cross the road, I kept walking to my car, and part of me wanted to go back in and help him. I guess it was because he seemed to be alone, that no one was there to help him, not even his children. He had come to the grocery store by himself, and to me, that magnified his age. Not only is he struggling to make it across the road, but no one cares, not even those who he brought into the world as his progeny. The people who were driving back and forth in the parking lot were moving so fast that it seemed that one of them would easily run over him and keep going, not giving it a second thought. He was just someone who was waiting to die, at least to me, and as I walked out the car, I thought about how easy it is as a young person to take my youth for granted. Its easy to write off older people as being just a foot in the grave, waiting for their final nap. I kept thinking about it once I got home, and I decided that next time I see someone like that, that I'll turn around and at least offer to help them, not because I pity them and I think they need help, but because I want them to know that someone cares, and that someone doesn't want them to be walking zombies waiting for the grave to swallow them.

My mood?

I really couldn't tell you. . .

Monday, May 17, 2004

Silence monkeys!! Yes, it is the moment you all have been waiting for. And no, I don't think any monkey's really read any of these posts. But there's nothing better than a rainbow monkey. Yep. So anyway, I'm finally done with school, I've finished all of my classes and now its time for some rest and relaxation. So what does that involve? Well basically just work and service, so really there isn't any time for the relaxation, except I don't have to learn anything. That's always a plus. So I'm really not back into the swing of things, but not to worry I'll be back around to myself in no time. I haven't had too many deep thoughts, but when some hit me I'll be sure to post them. Anyway, take it easy.

My mood?

Proof that bears exist?

Friday, May 07, 2004

I just saw this on someone else's blog and I'm all about stealing and thievery (well at least when it comes to the blog) so here we go!

Using one artist's lyrics, answer the following questions
(I'm interpreting this as one artist per question)

Are you female or male:
I met a gypsy and she hipped me to some life game
To stimulate then activate the left and right brain
Said baby boy you only funky as your last cut
- Andre Benjamin Rosa Parks

Describe yourself:

"because i'm lost, i'm confused
the reality we choose
is a long, long way from the dream. . ."
"but i've looked to the east
and i've prayed in the west
what i knw, i've seen
you just couldn't imagine
where i've been
and i feel at this time
i just need to rest"
- The Tea Party Samsara

How do some people feel about you:

"'cause my style ain't a style
That is a style"
- Craig Mack Can I Get Down?

How do you feel about yourself:

"Take me out alive
Take me out it's all so stale
Give me another life
Excuse me if I tried and failed
And I don't mind if I fall
It's not that far at all
I got a new thing, it's so inspired
It's not the real thing, but it's for me
Because the real thing I don't desire
So it's the new thing I choose for me
Denial comfort me"
- Fuel New Thing

Describe your ex girlfriend/boyfriend:

"All my friends say they told me so
But it doesn't matter
It was plain to see
That a small town boy like me
Just I wasn't your cup of tea
I was wishful thinking
I gave you my heart
And I tried ot make you happy
And you gave me nothing in return
You know it ain't so hard to say
Would you please just go away?"
- The Commodores Sail On

Describe your current girlfriend/boyfriend:

"Purple Haze all around,
don't know if I'm coming up or down.
Am I happy or in misery?
Whatever it is, that girl put a spell on me."
-Jimi Hendrix Purple Haze

Describe where you want to be:
"I want to be free to know the things I do are right. . .I want to be free. . .so free"
The Commodres High On Sunshine

Describe what you want to be/do:

"If only I could get through this
If only I could get through this
If only I could get through this
God, God gotta help me get through this"
Daniel Beddingfield Gotta Get Through This

Describe how you live:

("just like music")
To do somethin to me like jump in the Mercedes
On the highway, doin over eighty
Without music baby.. ("Oww! I'll go crazy.. just like music")
Make me call my homey on the phone
Like there's somethin new out, that got me in the zone
Just that feelin, got me
I wish music can adopt me ("just like music")
- Erick Sermon ft. Marvin Gaye Music

Describe how you love:

"All alone by the phone
Waiting on you to call on a busy weekend
Tell me have I seen when I stayed around
Around the town waiting on you to tell me what to do
Cuz I'm happy being with you. . .
If love is just a silly game
Then I'm a fool that sang for loving you
Still I feel you don't have nothing to prove"
- Carl Thomas Giving You All My Love

Share a few words of wisdom:

"We get some rules to follow
That and this, these and those
No one knows
We get these pills to swallow
How they stick in your throat
Taste like gold
Oh what you do to me
No one knows. . ."
"Heaven smiles above me
What a gift here below
But no one knows
The Gift you give to me
No one knows."
- Queens of the Stone Age No One Knows
Another Friday is upon us. And what brings this day of unnatural terror? Well, its about five o'clock, the cows are calling and someone just woke up with sleep and bad dreams in his eyes and head. That someone is of course, Senor Jones, and the bad dream was indeed bad. SO here's what happened: I was at work eating some rock shrimp out of the cooler, and I see this guy standing at the back door watching. He's about 55, or 60 years old, but still a pretty big guy, with this weird eye. Its all white and cataracty, and when I look at him, he just kinda looks at me and nods. So I nod back finish filling the bowl I'm carrying with rock shrimp. He points at the bowl and then beckons me over, quite rudely I must say. I want to avoid conflict, and I'm not scared of the guy, and I'm ME (all 6'5" of me) and so I figure, hey lets give the man a break. SO I go over to him and then he grabs me clubs me over the back of the head with the bowl, and I remember thinking, STUPID!! So then I come to in this room, and I'm on a table by myself. As I look around I notice a weird smell, and then I see the walls are. . .throbbing. I reach out and touch one (AT&T style) and its this slimy gross, LIVING fibrous mass, and as I yank my hand back I notice that the table's definitely not a table, but some kind of tentacle that was holding me. At this point I'm far from calm in fact, I'm ready to scream, and then the clincher comes. My feet start burning. I look down at my shoes and there are holes in them and my feet are itching turning into burning and I realize, I'm in something's LARGE stomach. And I WANT OUT!! So I reach into my pocket, yank out the knife I carry to work and I rip a hole into the wall. As soon as I rip the hole, this somewhat viscuous purple fluid begins pouring into the "room" and I notice the stomach starting to seal itself. I rip again and then force my way out into the purple fluid. I'm panicking at this time because I'm holding my breath, and I can't see anyway out, and I'm a terrible swimmer, so much so that I'm a non-swimmer (real life and in the dream) Then I feel this stinging in my leg, and these monkey sized blobs are trying to engulf my leg, and then I realize. . .those are the antibodies of this thing. What did that guy do to me? Then I see a light so I swim to it and I hit at the monkey blobs, and as I thrust my knife into the where I saw the light, I could feel the purple stuff vibrating and my ears felt like they were going to pop, and then I ripped through and I was outside in this meadow full of flowers and grass, and I covered in purple fluid, and then as I laid down, I felt the ground rumble, and then it opened apart and I woke up as I fell down into it. So yeah, intense dream indeed. That having been said I'll leave you to wonder what exactly is wrong with me.
My mood?

It was all just a dream. . .right?