Let me start off by saying first that I generally take criticism well. Actually, no, I take that back. I don't take criticism well. My gut reaction to being criticized is similar to the knee jerk reaction, except of course I react with my fist. So my first reaction to hey, Javann whar you're doing kind of sucks is to punch you, the critic, square in the teeth. That having been said, I'd like to see any of you out there try to cricize me without ducking.
Of course, I'm just joking. I have yet to actually punch someone who criticized me, and honestly, I generally welcome it when someone does. But you know what I really hate? When I ask for an opinion, say some music I'm working on, and somone's like, yeah its good, sounds great, then later when I listen to whatever it was, I think, man this sucks, why didn't (won't point fingers but you know who you are) so and so tell me this sucks? Were they sparing my feelings? The sad part is I probably could've done better, but since someone who heard it objectively without any bias (or at least that's what I thought) was like no its good, I thought, oh well its good enough, I don't need to put anymore work in on it. Which is why I think most people are more critical of themselves because they truthfully can't trust most people when it comes to an honest opinion. I know I can't. And I don't understand this need to spare my feelings when, honestly, most friends of mine know that I wouldn't give you the same consideration. If you ask me to be honest and critique something, there's a solid chance that I will rip you or it a new one. I mean lets face it, I'm not known for my incredible propensity to actually like things. I am by nature a critical person of course. If you don't believe me, go back through my blog and really read some of it. I suggest most of the posts from 2004, with a few vintage posts from 2003 thrown in for good measure.
Which brings me to yet another point. I've blogging now for almost five years. seriously. That's a super long time. SO far I've only written 440 or so posts, I was going to go all statistician on it and give these wonderful numerics, but honestly, I just don't feel like doing all that. I will however say this. Maybe you haven't noticed, but many of the sites that started when mine did (the Knoxville one comes to mind, as does Misconstruedthoughts, which by the way, I sorta helped birth) have come and gone. Yet, this my weird little blog has withstood the test of time. I used to have multiple contributors of course (and I'm still kind of leaning towards doing another open call to people who'd want to contribute to my site, more on that later) but thus far I have not lost the desire to (occasionally) express my opinion on a little bit of everything. Pretty much every area of American suburban life has been touched by my Southern charm. (I can't type that with a straight face) And now, after all is said and done, I can't help wondering:
Why the heck did I not figure out how to get paid for this?
I just don't get it. I should have put a donations through PayPal link up or something, or even just sold some ad space, but honestly, all of this typing for what? With the exception of some of it being turned in last moment as a journal assignment for a class I had back in 03 (or was that 04, my college years blur together)I've not gotten any personal benefit from this blog. So I guess what I'm saying in a round about way, is
I've managed to enrich your life and hopefully make you smile, maybe think a little, and of course, question my sanity. I think my work here is done.
Though, I will say, this is by no means over.
till next time.