Saturday, December 20, 2003
You know, Superman could afford to be a boyscout. He's invunerable. Whenever a villain attacked a tourist bus, or a boat full of innocents, Superman could easily say, we'll track him down later, right now, lets save these people's lives. Granted, Superman had some good qualities, but really, how dangerous is it for you save people's lives if the only thing that can hurt you in a crystalline growth not found on earth? If I were an alien endowed with special powers and red underwear, I'd figh crime too. Speaking of red underwear, Superman was a total glory hog. What self respecting super hero wears BRIGHT red and blue, with a large S on his chest. He might as well scream, "Hey look at me, I am the man of steel!!" And what exactly is the deal with his glasses? How can so many people assume that Superman is so powerful, he'd never backdown from a fight, or act so humbly? Wait a minute, let me take my glasses off. Okay, this is Javann here. Wait, let me put them back on, I'm Clark the dweeb, mild mannered and softspoken, yet of the same height and impressive build as Superman. Though our facial structure too is remarkably similar, as well as our inflection and vocabulary, you shouldn't worry, I wear glasses and I am meek and mild. Certainly not strong. That would be preposterous. Superman would never feign humility in an effort to disguise himself. Superman also wears his underwear on the outside of his tights. What were the artist's who created the costume of Superman thinking? What self-respecting man wouldn't wear his matching underwear where they could be seen? Either way, Superman is in need of much more than a makeover. I recall a time when they attempted to make him more popular in the comic books. The way to do this of course, was to kill him. Exactly my point. If the only way to become more popular and likeable to your so-called fans is to die, then I think its time to reconsider a new path in life. I could picture Superman filing books in a library or as a laboratory assistant, someone who blows on the volatile chemicals to keep them cold. However, Batman, now there's a real hero. Pure skill and deductive reasoning, as well as determination, and a decidely dark demeanor is what makes this hero four or five times better than Superman. Its an age old debate really, and apparently Batman wins in a fight between him and Superman everytime because Superman's not much of a challenge. And Batman is a formidable foe indeed. Either way, feel free to salivate some intelligence my way.