Sunday, October 19, 2003
Okay, maybe not so much blah. Salutations, Twizzlers! I found my carmex, and now my lips are feeling G double O D. That's right, guh hood!! Okay, I'm really not that elated over finding my carmex, but now my lips won't get all ashy and crackly, and I won't look like I've been in solitaire for the last three years. Speaking of which, I've had this really weird dream that Skyler was in. That's right, SKYLER!! You were in my dream man. So what happened was we were in this really bad detective movie. But we didn't know it, it was like, we were two detectives, complete with the rolled up suit coat sleeves and the bad shades. But we were in my car. It was hilarious, really. There was a villain, which was E-Side funny, cause he had like this jheri-curl. For my uninitiated, a jheri curl is. . .well, let me find a picture. Anyway, so we're trying to run him down, and we're doing all of the cool detective poses. You know the cool back to back, but we didn't have guns, but we still looked cool. So I get a call on my eighties cellular phone, and its Danny, and he's all like, dude, I got this note. And I'm all like, what note, Dann-O? And he says, someone's kidnapped Ashley, and its signed the Claw. And I swear my jaw drops and I'm like, "We're on it!!" and I yell to Skyler who's trying to get some girl with big hair's number, "Lets book, baby brother!!" So then we run to my Toyota Camry, which somehow is now a convertible. And I slide across the hood, very Starsky and Hutch-esque, and we speed away, which is shocking cause you know we're in the Camry. But the coolest part was when I slide across the hood I make my own sound effect, and its like "SLIDE!!" and then Skyler slides across the trunk and he makes his own sound effect and he's like "SLIDE NUMERO DOS!!" I think that's the first time I laughed in my sleep, but I'm pretty sure I did, but anyway!! So then we zoom off and suddenly guys on bikes pull up behind me and start shooting at us, and so I toss Sky my magnum outta the dash, and he stands up in the car and starts shooting. This isn't even the half, cause we're on like a highway, the typical shoot out highway, of course. And he's just blasting away, and he's like, yelling at me to hold the car steady, and then I'm telling him to learn to shoot better, and all in all its just really a big gun fest, since they're also shoot at me. So then Skyler shoots out one of the biker dudes tires and he wrecks and comes flying ahead of me. So I swerve like mad and suddenly I'm flying off a cliff and Skyler's going with me and we're screaming at the top of our lungs and we hit the water, and then suddenly i'm in the police station and Tremaine's there cuffed, and my dad's screaming at both of us about the damage we've caused, and how we're off the force. So I'm all like yes sir, but Skyler's yelling about how we're the best cops he's ever seen, and how we'll catch the Claw and then we'll have his job. So then we end up busting into this warehouse, and Skyler goes all Matrix-y, and starts taking out these mexicans who are stashing cocaine into boxes of flavored drink mix, but not Kool-Aid. SO then I was in front of this huge Colombian dude, and he had berrettas and he started firing and just shot Skyler to bits and I yanked out my eighties cellular phone and called 911, and then I engaged in the most stylized fight scene I've ever imagined. We went at it for what seemed like hours and hit each other with tables, chairs, chains, spent cartridges from other guns, sticks, brooms, mops, weights, and pipes. And I was winning and right when i was going to push him to his doom, Skyler stopped me cause he only got hit in the shoulder, and he's like, no, don't sink to his level. And then suddenly music started playing and then we were sitting on a cop car and my dad gave us our badges back and Skyler said something funny, and I woke up to Hey Papi skipping in my Cd player. And thats when i looked around realized, hey this was just a dream. Man that was funny. Anyway, that's the extent of my dream, thanks for reading. Oh yeah. Well, have your cake and eat it to, ya M&M's. That'll just about do it for today.